5 Hilarious Beach Reads You Will Totally Relate To

In 2011, New York Times book critic Neil Genzlinger wrote, “A moment of silence, please, for the lost art of shutting up. There was a time when you had to earn the right to draft a memoir, by accomplishing something noteworthy or having an extremely unusual experience or being such a brilliant writer that you could turn relatively ordinary occur­rences into a snapshot of a broader historical moment.” With all due respect to Genzlinger and the Times, we’re happy people are spilling all, because more often than not in doing so, they make us feel better about our lives. Such is the case with these five books, which made us laugh, feel less alone and realize that all of our bad Tinder dates could one day be fodder for a best-selling book. If you liked Tina Fey’s Bossypants, Mindy Kaling’s Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me, Chelsea Handler’s Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea and Amy Poehler’s Yes Please, these are your next must-reads.

What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding by Kristin Newman

We've re-read this one multiple times, because it's laugh-out-loud funny and always makes us feel better about being in whatever place in life we're in (read: single with cats). Sitcom writer (That '70s Show, How I Met Your Mother) Kristin recounts her adventures as a single woman in her 30s traveling the world solo, but in a way that's more Sex and the (Foreign) City than Eat Pray Love. One of our favorite quotes from the book: "A hateful little ex-boyfriend once said that a houseful of cats used to be the sign of a terminally single woman, but now it's a house full of souvenirs acquired on foreign adventures. He said it derogatorily: Look at all of this tragic overcompensating in the form of tribal masks and rain sticks. But I say that plane tickets replacing cats might be the best evidence of women's progress as a gender. I'm damn proud of us. Also, since I have both a cat and a lot of foreign souvenirs, I broke up with that dude and went on a really great trip."

What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding, $12

You'll Grow Out Of It by Jessi Klein

We'd read a laundry list written by the head writer of Inside Amy Schumer, but luckily she's done us a few steps better by writing a collection of hilarious essays. She covers ageism—she was the writer behind "Last F*ckable Day" on Inside, after all—dating, infertility and even the more mundane aspects of life as a modern woman. Of her love for Anthropologie, she writes that it makes her feel, "emotionally home … as if somewhere behind the rack of Eiffel Tower dish towels, I will find MY REAL DAD." Our favorite line from the book, however, is one with a more serious slant: "When I looked at what it would mean to become a woman—one of those standard grown-up ladies, like the ones from commercials for gum or soda or shampoo—it all seemed to involve shrinking rather than growing."

You'll Grow Out Of It, $11

I Don't Care About Your Band by Julie Klausner

Jezebel called this book "a dating memoir we can get behind," and we agree. Many of us (some more than others) can relate to the author's bad habit of dating bad guys, and Julie's book recounts this phenomenon in her own life with humor and, ultimately, a host of positive takeaways. If you want to fully appreciate this read, however, first you should check out her podcast How Was Your Week With Julie Klausner as well as her Hulu show Difficult People.

I Don't Care About Your Band, $10

Let's Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson

Jenny is an insanely engaging writer, which accounts for the massive following behind her website, The Bloggess. Let's Pretend This Never Happened is her first book, and it's a raw and hilarious look at an eccentric life punctuated by anxiety and an obsession with taxidermy, perhaps best enjoyed on a deserted island as opposed to a crowded beach, as you'll be laughing out loud so often, someone's likely to mistake you for a demented person and call the cops on you. Her more recent book, Furiously Happy, explores her mental health issues in depth but loses none of its hilarity in the process. She's also just announced that she's working on a coloring book/journal hybrid that'll serve as a companion piece to Furiously Happy. We can't wait.

Let's Pretend This Never Happened, $13

The Girl With The Lower Back Tattoo by Amy Schumer

This will be a late summer read, as it's not out until August 16. We suggest you pre-order ASAP if you're a fan of Amy's (who isn't, other than Internet trolls?), as the book promises to take its place among the greats of its genre. The title alone has us laughing out loud, and of the book, Amy cheekily said in a statement, "Believe it or not, I've got more to say." We hope that never changes. Another book to pre-order, while you're at it? Anna Kendrick's upcoming Scrappy Little Nobody, which hits shelves in November.

The Girl With The Lower Back Tattoo, $12